RT @FakeAPStylebook Describe a spring shower as "light" or "pleasant." If you're in California, use "STORM WATCHAGEDDON 2010." #

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In a study that resulted in countless deaths, science recently settled on the fact that there are 304 different ways to use the word “dude.” I don’t have a link for that. Just trust me. You don’t hate science do you, you freakin birther!!!!!?????
Anyway, prepare to use all 304 versions when you read this.
Angie Sanselmente Valencia, a former lingerie model, is believed to be heading one of the world’s largest drug gangs.
Dude.
An international arrest warrant has been issued for the 30-year-old, who is suspected of recruiting beautiful women and using …

FROM THE MAILBAG:
I heard a deal on the radio … they ask you in all parks to NOT feed the animals. They lose their own foraging skills and EXPECT food from people. They get very cranky if they don’t get it!!
This is such a tragedy to see what they have done to our country’s wildlife!
The photo below captures a disturbing trend that is beginning to affect US wildlife.
Animals that were formerly self-sufficient are now showing signs of belonging to the Democratic Party… as they have apparently learned to just sit …

So it’s November 2010. Election day has come and gone. You’ve spent the last ten days drinking in every precious Democrat tear with sadistic glee. But now what? What to do next? You feel lost. Aimless. Adrift.
If you are having this same recurring dream then I have two questions for you. 1. In yours, are you in your underwear? 2. What are you going to do about it?
Well my friends, you’ve come to the right place. Because I had that same dream (boxers), and after I woke up the last …

Exurban League has the skinny on the new, evil Obama the White House is rolling out lately:
“Voters are understandably angry,” according to one official. “They need to see Democrats as the party that punishes Wall Street, regulates fat-cat bankers and insults pick-up trucks,” one adviser said.
The new, angry Obama was unveiled in a speech in economically depressed Lorain County, Ohio. Walking onto the stage with pyrotechnic flash-pots blazing, the president shouted, “I was sent to Washington to kick ass and chew arugula. And the White House organic garden is all …

The mysterious visitor who has marked Edgar Allan Poe’s birthday each year with flowers and cognac failed to show this morning, causing no small upset among devoted Poe fans. This is my take on that.

Once upon a morning dreary, as they huddled cold but cheery
Waiting near the graveyard gates, a darkened scene in Baltimore
There they shivered, even quivered, ’till dawn slivered
to see delivered loving tokens just as every year before.
For sixty years, but now no more.
Flowers there were to remember, poet lost that long November
placed there by a special member …

Michelle Malkin has an article up showing the smug shirt the DNC is flogging:

Michelle invited photoshops that more accurately reflect what the Democrats have done to us. Here’s my entry:

In honor of the new documentary about the end of the world, 2012, the universe has fired a warning shot at Utah. Take THAT Nevada’s space cred!

I’ve taken the liberty of translating the universe’s threat into graphic form:

Man. The universe can be a jerk. But then, we already knew that.

Yes. Really. With inspirational stories …
One time I was at a photo shoot and feeling down, but the inspirational quotes and hysterical YouTube videos my fans sent me via Twitter helped brighten my mood.
… and thoughtful analysis ….
I joined Twitter in April, after Ryan Seacrest kept telling my family how great the service was. Since then, I’ve attracted more than 2.5 million followers—more than Ryan himself, not to mention Oprah and Barack Obama!
… you can totally see why they selected @KimKardashian for the honor of contributing to their top ten …

Well say it out loud.

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.
Well I’m three wolves. And a moon.
Yes, that did just happen. And I just have to add:

from @bramus. Because … well … dude.

H/t @SisterToldjah @GayPatriot @jaxy89
Previously: White House Powerpoint Exposed!

Until very recently, there has been a glaring gap in coverage of all things geeky. Sure, you can update your blog from facebook, facebook from twitter, twitter from your phone, and your phone from your computer. But what, we have longsufferingly pleaded, about the gamers?!
Haven’t you ever been sitting at home on a Saturday night deeply immersed in some multiplayer console game …  (I  know, you’re reading tWits. That part of the question was rhetorical.) … and thought “Darn it! I wish my tweeps and facebeeps (that’s a thing, right?) …