We at tWits had a lot of fun yesterday playing the #obamacarols hashtag game–okay, some more than others, as some of us were busy listening to *NSYNC’s Christmas CD and praying to Jesus and the Pilgrims that our gluten-free cookies and pies turned out right. (That was Tommy, if you’re wondering.) We had so much fun with it that we decided we need a whole song about what Obama will mean for our festival of winter SolstiChristmaKwanzaRamaHanamas, or whatever the politically correct term is this year. So we present to you…

“ON THE OPRAH CHRISTMAS SPECIAL” (sung to the tune of–well, you figure it out, because if you can’t, we’ve really had a failure of concept here)

• On the Oprah Christmas Special, we’d really like to see… a world tour of apology.
• On the Oprah Christmas Special, we’d really like to see… two teleprompters and a world tour of apology.
• On the Oprah Christmas Special, we’d really like to see… three wussy bows, two teleprompters, and a world tour of apology.
• On the Oprah Christmas Special, we’d really like to see… four rounds of golf, three wussy bows, two teleprompters, and a world tour of apology.
• On the Oprah Christmas Special, we’d really like to see… FIVE… ACORN STINGS!… Four rounds of golf, three wussy bows, two teleprompters, and a world tour of apology.
• On the Oprah Christmas Special, we’d really like to see… six chickens roosting, FIVE… ACORN STINGS!… Four rounds of golf, three wussy bows, two teleprompters, and a world tour of apology.
• On the Oprah Christmas Special, we’d really like to see… seven… hundred pressers, six chickens roosting, FIVE… ACORN STINGS!… Four rounds of golf, three wussy bows, two teleprompters, and a world tour of apology.
• On the Oprah Christmas Special, we’d really like to see… eight commies bombing, seven hundred pressers, six chickens roosting, FIVE… ACORN STINGS!… Four rounds of golf, three wussy bows, two teleprompters, and a world tour of apology.
• On the Oprah Christmas Special, we’d really like to see… nine non-decisions, eight commies bombing, seven hundred pressers, six chickens roosting, FIVE… ACORN STINGS!… Four rounds of golf, three wussy bows, two teleprompters, and a world tour of apology.
• On the Oprah Christmas Special, we’d really like to see… ten thugs a-beating, nine non-decisions, eight commies bombing, seven hundred pressers, six chickens roosting, FIVE… ACORN STINGS!… Four rounds of golf, three wussy bows, two teleprompters, and a world tour of apology.
• On the Oprah Christmas Special, we’d really like to see… eleven czars resigning, ten thugs a-beating, nine non-decisions, eight commies bombing, seven hundred pressers, six chickens roosting, FIVE… ACORN STINGS!… Four rounds of golf, three wussy bows, two teleprompters, and a world tour of apology.
• On the Oprah Christmas Special, we’d really like to see… twelve trillion dollars, eleven czars resigning, ten thugs a-beating, nine non-decisions, eight commies bombing, seven hundred pressers, six chickens roosting, FIVE… ACORN STINGS!… Four rounds of golf, three wussy bows, two teleprompters, and a world tour of apology.

Teach it to your kids so they can get expelled from school.

I can’t take credit for this post alone. That saucy broad @cprater and I spitballed the night away until our husbands gave up on dinner and sex and went to bed–hungry, horny, and alone. Anyway, you can just assume that anything hilarious was my idea, and anything meh was hers. You know. In Opposite Land. Graphic by @ExJon.

UPDATE: In living color.